spirituality

How to keep up with reality during Neptune Retrograde

Niti K - Unsplash - Foxglove Tarot Bali - Neptune Retrograde

Dreaming of a better tomorrow is always good for the soul. But what if the reality is bleaker than your fantasy? Will you accept it, or will you keep the illusion alive?

These are the questions that we need to ask while Neptune is turning retrograde from June 16th to November 22nd, 2017.

As the planet of dreams and illusion, Neptune is in charge of creating smoke and mirrors to your reality. When Neptune moves direct, you’ll get to see a bigger picture of your goals, instead of focusing what’s in front of you. Even the harsh reality will not seem so bad for us. Hey, Neptune makes anything looks and feels possible, okay. Just like Photoshop for the soul.

Now that we’re in a Neptune retrograde period, we’ll get to encounter more of that deer in the headlights moment when faced with the truth. No more sugar coating for us. The reality will come as it is, regardless of how bleak or uninspiring it is. Except for psychics or those with heightened sensitivity, you might get overload information instead. Anyway, please avoid any drugs or addiction that can blur your judgment.

But don’t worry! You’ll get the hang of it once you know how Neptune retrograde can benefit you.

Wakey, wakey! It’s evaluation time!

Let’s say you’ve been in a long term relationship with someone and you feel the need to bring it to the next level. With Neptune moving retrograde you’ll begin to question the need and evaluate it before popping the question. Neptune will lift the veil for you and bring the reality right to your front door. It's not going to be all pretty since the flaws will make up just as much as the good stuff, btw.

What to do: Make sure you consider both the advantage and the red flags before you decide on any long-term commitment, whether in love, career, or finance.

Stop living a lie.

Neptune retrograde will feel surreal, particularly for those who live in pretense or strive in their own La La Land. Your greatest fear will rise to the surface. And for those who have been running away from it, will only experience it over and over again. You can try, but I suggest you face the music and dance. Accept the shadow as a part of you. Accept that you can’t always win in life. For example, if your financial situation hasn’t been doing well, admit it, and plan a strategy to increase your income. Neptune Retrograde is a great time to stop the escapism and find new ways to cope with reality.

What to do: If you’ve been telling yourself that everything is going to be okay (even though it won’t), you should stop at once, accept the harsh fact, and do something about it.

Let’s embrace spirituality!

The retrograde movement makes it a great period to learn and immerse yourself in spirituality. As the planet of psychic ability and intuition, the Neptune retrograde will heighten your senses to perceive things beyond the usual context. Get a better sense of who you are and what is your purpose in this world. You might have a clearer idea of what to do when you can finally internalize your fear of uncertainty.

What to do:  Do more meditation or yoga, or read more spiritual self-help books. I’m currently reading Be Here Now by Ram Dass. You should give it a try!

They say "Ignorance is a bliss". But to me, it's better to know the truth than living an unsatisfactory life, especially if it can cause more problem in the future. What do you think?

Trouble in paradise? Get your personalized Neptune retrograde reading with me today!  Click here to book a session.


Photo credit: Niti K - Unsplash


Foxglove Tarot Bali

Hello, I'm Canti!

I am a tarot reader and an eclectic witch living in Bali, providing online tarot reading and blessing service for the mindful soul-searchers. Contact me at www.foxglovetarot.com to book a private counseling session with me.

i tried shrooms to be spiritual. this is what happened.

pink water sheet tumblr fluorescent iridescent


I've heard crazy stories about shrooms trip from my party friends but never thought that I could actually use it for a spiritual trip.

Earlier this week, I met a friend who visited me in Ubud with her boyfriend to discuss with me about spiritual related topics. Those two seemed to be enthusiastic about everything spiritual so I asked how they got in touch with their spiritual side - since all Ubud tourists must have had an awakening at some point in their life. He told me that ever since he took shrooms in Bali, his sense got heightened and all of the sudden everything made sense for him. He had a very spiritual trip with ecstatic appearances of nature elements such as dancing trees or anthropomorphic frogs. Things were never the same for both of them.

Their brief enlightening experience had elevated their spirituality level and although they are unable to access that part anymore, at least they understand that they can feel it again with enough training. At that point I thought to myself that maybe the shrooms has unlocked the full potential of their seven chakras, giving them a sip of the sensation of being attuned with the universe. One thing I’m curious about is if the shrooms can have such illuminating effect to someone without any spiritual background, then what’s it going to do to me? It gives me a chill just to think about it, because there’s a possibility it will take me back to that dark and depressed limbo, but they assured me that everything is going to be fine.

So I decided to give it a try. I contacted the person based on my friends’ recommendation, packed the shrooms shake that I bought in Kuta (Magic Mushroom is literally available in Legian Road), and went home all the way to Ubud. I didn’t want to experience the trip when my house is swarmed by dark spirits (which happens every night between 11pm to 5am), because god knows where they’ll take me to, so I decided to take the trip on daytime instead, which was the next day after I bought it.

Below is my unedited notes from the trip. Yes I prefer it to be unedited because that’s the only way you can experience it with me. 😀

If you don’t know what the shrooms are actually doing to your brain, you can check this video by AsapSCIENCE.

(Note: The trip condition was: I was at my house, which is located at Northern Ubud, pretty close to the uphill mountain side. There’s a garden at my place, a cafe right beside my house [which plays 90s song non stop], and a rice field right in front of my window which has a lot of ducks swimming around. Oh and I have this black wild street dog that keeps on coming to my house. I named her Doggi.)

Before tripping:

Expectation: To be more spiritual. Maybe to see more spirits? Or to get new kinds of enlightenment?

Texted my friend who recommended me the shrooms. She said: “Have a nice trip! (pun intended)” Hahahah.

Tripping time:

2.08pm

Drank the first glass of the shake. Tastes like syrup + mixing with red-colored soda + it actually tastes pretty good!

Looks like wine now, a bunch of residue on the bottom

first sensation: it’s on the crown area, all over the head, meditative state like. Feeling really happy and giddy. Watching the duck and they’re like super funny. Finished the whole glass by munching the mushroom residues.

Start to feel tingling on my feet. It feels painful.

So I decided to take the second glass. Just go for it. Gulp it all.

2.22pm
Headache a bit nauseous
Neck feels really hot, nauseous, heavy on the back. 
Keep on burping. Face feels burnt, Twisty tummy

So I lied down. It’s like I’m having a crazy sickening fever and the ceiling feels as if it’s moving down. All senses are open, Feels like the first time I’m having an awakening.  Every movement of the plants and trees are shaking because they wants to talk to you

2.35pm
My body feels super hot

Look at the ceiling greenish blue

First part of hallucination:
The floor makes funny pattern
The wall moves closer
Sinking into the bed
I can also see some pattern emerges on my skin
Time moves slo mo
The dots on my pillowcase is growing big but I guess I shouldn’t waste my time looking at it

Vision intensifies
All the yellow just goes yellow. Bright bright yellow
There are faces on the wall

This actual life that we're living is very fragile. With a little bit of colors and fun we can see a little bit more than expected. 

Okay I'm starting to see rainbow lines in everything. Even my phone.

Died yoghurt?

If I close my eyes I keep on seeing red and blue women devils with tits claw and angry faces.

I thought my hands are dinosaurs.

I want to close my eyes but I'm pretty scared. Come let's meditate, little girl

It's a mind altering drug but it's not social at all. You just gotta feel it alone

Man if it's quiet time actually it's not really quiet. You astart to listen to stuffs in the distance

And then voice gets distorted. Like the crappy music from the neighbor

The plants are asking me to fly with them. Idk if it makes sense.

If I close my eyes, things start to have either eyeballs, teeth, or mouth or boobs and hands and claw in it.

The phone is the only reality that I have now.

I keep on hearing weird cricket. The voice keeps on repeiting by itself.

The voice of the duck multiplies. Like fast forward 100 times
You can hear bird from really2 far. It's like holy shit that's bird????1 Never heard bird from my house

Subconscious is a scary place for people who doesn't sleep

The trip feels so tiring
I can listen and sre and feel everything
This whole sound is a loop why loop idk

I realized that the cloud has been shifting from one another and that reality is really depends on what you wanna see
If you close your eyes


R

3.30pm
So hot
lost in thought, actually it's a nice day outside dammmit really no place to runaway ya
everywhere i see is a new trip

I guess I can settle here? With the ducks and the loud irritating neighbor

Went outside to see the clouds
The sky feels near af
So hot why don’t we have a bigger fan

 I guess I need to see who lives in ganesha but does it really matter?
Saw om on his trunk
All the dirt just intensifies

I tried looking at my tarot cards and they're hologram. I thought I will see the spirits inside it.
I start to understand what the cards actually mean

3.55pm
Doggi comes
She was just from the rice field.
Sooo dirty. Can see the dirt and blue flashes magnified. She’s not smelly tho
Now the abstract thoughts starting to come
What did she actually do with all those ducks? In the farm?

I noticed that from the room you can see really far
The neighbours house look so near
Then far
Then near again


4pm
Suddenly life has a meaning. It's like now you get why certain people has to liv this way. And then why do you have to talk? Is talking matter? Nothing matters now because it's between you and your creator.

Watching the ducks. Wow they swim in straight line.
Text Rain to tell her about ducks.

Notice lizard poopoo near the window. Theres ants under the crack too

Suddenly I understand the anatomi of the duck. Yeah man, it's just us. Living. Being
Why do people care so much about fb likes when you can be out there living feeling what the nature offers you

Man i cant remember to breathe sometimes atau kayak focusing myself to talk
Tried drinking water. Forgot how to swallow


The sun is just going to die at some point and im just here tripping sitting in the room? What the flying fuck

Wow even when im tripping i feel like working?

4.50pm
I head outside to bring the trip to me. Took a walk and saw black cow doggo and white doggo. The hallucination part is over though. So no more funny2 thoughts. Just following the trail and the dogs.

Saw big grasshopper on my bike. Thats when I realised that I can zoom in my vision like 3x bigger. Can see even the smallest insect. 

5.13pm
Noticed a bunch of stuffs is not as organic as it seems. Plastic in rice fields. But that's the most natural you can get man.

Tried hard not to giggle at random person.

5.27pm
So tired. Brain just get friggen tired i can't even rationalized things anymore

8pm
Finally sober. Texted my friends telling them I’m sober after texting them while tripping earlier.

Learned that the pattern that I’ve seen on my hands are actually Flower of Life.
Suddenly crave for vegan raw food, which is weird.

Must plan next trip. Maybe night time instead of daytime.


Conclusion:
It was a very fascinating trip! Although I didn’t really enjoy closing my eyes while tripping and I was very irritated with the neighbour, I would love to revisit the shrooms experience next time. Maybe in 2-3 weeks time. 

Did I get to be more spiritual? No, not really, actually. I had some contemplating thoughts but not so much new insights. Probably because I have been spiritual to begin with and the insights it presented have been learned through meditation. But the one thing I noticed was I felt present and fully aware that I was high. I knew that the reality it presented wasn’t the actual reality. It’s almost like experiencing lucid dream where you can alter what you want to see. I tried to create energy balls or shifted some images around and it actually worked! This helped me to steer clear from bad trip and focused on the things that made me happy such as clouds, ducks, dogs, and plants. Hahahaha.

Well I guess if you’ve never been in touch with your spiritual side you may get a more enlightening experience? I don’t really know though.

Have you had a weird shroom experience? Write it in the comment box below! Or if you have any questions regarding shrooms, just write it down and I’ll try to reply you asap.

Thanks for reading.

Photo credit: Took it from Tumblr. The account got deleted, though. 


Foxglove Tarot Bali

Hello, I'm Canti!

I am a tarot reader and an eclectic witch living in Bali, providing online tarot reading and blessing service for the mindful soul-searchers. Contact me at www.foxglovetarot.com to book a private counseling session with me.

we are finally moving to ubud, bali!

Rice field, rice field everywhere.

Rice field, rice field everywhere.

I don’t want to be a cry baby but last week I took a big step by moving to Bali. To pack up and living my dream - something that my soul has been yearning for - has finally come true.

To move out every 2 years, from city to city, from houses to houses, is exciting yet exhilarating. This time, I barely know what I’m doing and thinking about it makes me feel inadequate sometimes. When I moved to Singapore, I haven’t found any apartments, but I was confident enough to start anew as I had already made some friends along the way. On top of that, I also had the option to come home to my boyfriend at that time if I ever needed help with anything. So I bid adieu to my parents, packed my bags, and stayed at a backpacker’s hostel for a month before finally moved out to a decent place. Everything worked perfectly fine. Meanwhile, I had only been once to Ubud, I do not have any friends here (other than my boyfriend), I have never driven any bikes here nor finding my way around the town. The only thing that kept me going was my brain who is fluent in "self-rationalising”. It reassured me that by not knowing anyone, my productivity level will increase rapidly. "Less partying, more blogging." so she said. I’m not sure if it’s true or not since the longer I’m here, the more homesick I become.

Nevertheless, the time spent here has been nothing but peaceful and blissful. Have I told you that we finally found a house? Yes, we found a house! After driving around Ubud for 3 consecutive days we finally found a house that suits our needs. I wanted a house in a tranquil area with a calming vibe (without "external disturbance” or in this case, spirits) so I can practice meditation and yoga. My boyfriend wanted a similar thing. He required some space to do his leather works (it requires hammering), an ample kitchen to cook our favourite aglio olio, and hopefully a garden. Thankfully this house has everything we need! It’s a one bedroom villa on top of a hill, with a spacious bedroom, an outdoor shower, a kitchen with a perfectly working fridge, a living room with a hammock, and a garden equipped with a bonfire pit. Everywhere I look is green as we are surrounded with rice paddies. The most important thing is, this house made me feel grateful for waking up early every day (and I’m not even a morning person), although I still can’t be bothered to sleep early.

One thing I learned here, living in Ubud is an adventure that will never end. We rise early, cook breakfast, then we leave at around 9am to find amenities nearby. We note down some interesting places whenever we find one; like a treasure hunter. Sometimes, we go to nearby cities, hoping to find another traditional market or furniture craftsmen. We cat-called wild dogs and honk at them because they sit in the middle of the road - blocking the traffic with their wagging tail. We act like Dora and Boots, only with less questions to ask. 

We also learned how to live with simple contentment. I love to cook, but living here with a tight budget requires me to adjust my recipe from my usual greek salad to stir-fried kangkung. There is no mall around here, so waking up early and going to traditional market on a daily basis is requisite. We’re also pretty stingy with our cafe budget as we are just starting our own business. "Always go for the cheapest option!”, that’s our motto. Unlike the big cities where I had always lived, every day in Ubud is a 'summer dress day' or 'no makeup day'. In some rare occasion, it can also be translated as the 'no shower day'. Strangely, living in Ubud minimises my need to impress anyone or to care so much about my appearance. We have less here, but we never feel less one bit. ☺️

To close this blog post, I just want to say thank you for the outpouring love from our dear friends and family. Whether to our decision of moving to Ubud, or to start this Foxglove project, we are humbly grateful for your support. Recently I got some questions about living in Ubud or traveling to Bali. To answer your queries, I’ll be happy to write or post any recommendations on which places to go, how to get around, etc. I’m going to add this to my current spiritual based blog posts. 😇

May you have a great Tuesday!

XOXO,

Foxglove


Foxglove Tarot Bali

Hello, I'm Canti!

I am a tarot reader and an eclectic witch living in Bali, providing online tarot reading and blessing service for the mindful soul-searchers. Contact me at www.foxglovetarot.com to book a private counseling session with me.

the art of letting go

girl on a cliff contemplating
Sometimes letting things go is an act of far greater power than defending or hanging on.
— Eckhart Tolle

It was in December 2015 when I found my way to ‘consciousness’. I just recently graduated abroad, freshly released and ready to brace the corporate world. When it happened, I had been ‘awakened’ for a few years so the experience was shouldn’t have been surprising for me. Nonetheless, it still caught me off guard like a surprise call from a long distance relative.

I was 13 years old when my third eye chakra first opened. My first experience involved seeing/talking to entities around my area with my childhood friends. Fast forward 6 years later, I started practicing Wicca and divination during my free time. I continue to invest a lot of my time dabbling in spirituality and magick ever since.

But this time is different. It was unlike any of the awakenings I’ve experienced prior to this moment. Life has always been tough on me and I pride myself on being the strongest kind in the family who always put through with any obstacles along my way. So how come I felt so fragile this time? I felt as if the universe was pulling me to an entirely different direction of ‘consciousness’. It felt like I was being burned by a glaring wildfire that destroyed you with all its might and left you with nothing but the feeling of being naked and vulnerable. That’s when I started to hear these familiar little voices.

 

“Persevere, and you’ll rise from the ashes.” That’s what the little voice told me.

 

What followed afterward was a series of odd combinations of the feeling of contentment and discontentment. I was exceptionally unhappy with my career life regardless of what I have achieved and worked towards. Everything felt superficial and meaningless, thus I felt unhappy at most. At the same time, I started to be more aware of the simple things in life. Like that warm humid sunny day that I used to complain about? I enjoyed bathing in it now because it made me feel alive. Or the honest smile from the lady behind the counter? She made my day felt so much better with her smile. It’s baffling isn’t it, to realize how you are so much in contrast with yourself? The little voice agreed with me.

 

“You need to move to Ubud, Bali, in a few months time.” said the little voice.

 

The little voice didn’t explain what was exactly at the end of the rainbow. But it promised me that it will be a very enjoyable ride, just like how it promised me that I should date my current boyfriend because he’s the ultimate happiness bringer (which he is, to this very date). So I discussed with him about my escape plan. We agreed to follow the little voice this time around and we have decided to relocate in 2-3 months time. We still didn’t understand why until a few weeks later when my life took an extreme turn and I was left with no opportunity to continue my career. I had tried my best, but nothing seemed to work my way. I thought I could get a good shot in career and in life, but I was wrong. It’s as if life played an ironic joke against my will and pushed me straight from the edge of the cliff to follow the little voice’s path. I couldn’t think straight. All I can think about was, if I could ever achieve happiness from this moment onwards.

 

“Chasing things won’t make you happy. Being content, will.” said the little voice.

 

Then, it struck me. I realized what the little voice has been trying to say. What have I been looking for, exactly? Is it happiness? If so, I have been on the wrong path all these years. Happiness has nothing to do with external circumstances. If you think that you’ll be happy once you get a high paying job, a great husband, a big house, then you are following the path of discontentment. I have met successful people who still feel the void regardless of their abundance. On the other hand, some people who have nothing seems to be perfectly happy with their state. Yet they still have the time and money to share with others in need.

True happiness can only come hand in hand with the feeling of contentment. It can only be reached when we let go the need to control everything. When you are content, you start appreciating yourself and you'll be more aware of your surroundings. You’ll stop listening to the other little voice who told you to pursue the best things in life due to its fear of missing out. Yes, that nasty little voice whose existence is the epitome of greed. Once you harness these thoughts, you can finally have a chance at finding inner contentment.

So here I am, on my path towards happiness. I will be moving to Ubud, Bali, in one month time to pursue my passion in spirituality and divination. I’ll be working as a full-time tarot reader, open a crystal and metaphysical shop, and hone my skill in animal healing. There’s nothing but happiness and passion in channeling my creative energy to this project. Sure, there are obstacles to be dealt with, however, I can assure you that everything is worth it.

If you’re reading this, I’m not encouraging you to quit your job and take a leap. You can still do what you need to do to survive. Not everyone has the ability or the resources to leave everything behind, I know. Just remember to listen to the little voice once they decide to tell you to be happy and let things flow. You will be just fine. I’ve followed my little voice, and I can tell you that this is the only point in my life where I finally find true happiness within.

Love and Blessed Be,

Foxglove.


Foxglove Tarot Bali

Hello, I'm Canti!

I am a tarot reader and an eclectic witch living in Bali, providing online tarot reading and blessing service for the mindful soul-searchers. Contact me at www.foxglovetarot.com to book a private counseling session with me.